4:34am May 12th 2019

its a similar feeling to the one you get at a sleepover when youve been the only one awake for the past 2 hours sitting on your phone or laptop. Maybe you post something on instagram and refresh the page to see if any likes have come in. there are people around. you know theyre their, you just dont have access to them. you want to. you wanna talk to someone. have fun and enjoy a convorsation with a friend. but at this point you would even take a minor argument just to be able to have a convorsation.
its what it feels like to be the only one awake at 4:30 in the moring on mothers day Sunday. Youre suposed to do lunch with your mom later today. But here you are. coming down from a high in your bedroom at your dads house. he's right. you are pathetic.
everyone is asleep right now. everyone but you.
youre posting adopts in the hope that werid 15 year olds will give you some type of validation. but even then theirs nothing.
Your room honestly smells like cat shit. You know thats cause youre to lazy to vaccum the cat litter off the floor. youre honestly disgusting. its sad the way you live. i dont see how you keep your friends. Tayla i guess i understand cause her living condetions arent the best. they are definatly comparable to yours. perhaps a little worse if we are honest here. but its okay. you dont really mind. it makes you feel less embarrased about the state you live in. Its everyone else youre embarrased towards.
even the cats were asleep untill a few minuets ago. Now Bedcat is being needy and June is taking a long toung bath. You didnt even take a bath tonight. youre greasy and gross. you need to shower before you go see your mom tomorrow.

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