9:53pm February 10th 2019
Im still a huge piece of shit.
I should really just kill myself and make it easier on everyone.
Kristen wouldnt have someone nagging her to do things w me and being needy all the time.
Dad wouldnt have to deal with me being a lazy piece of shit that dosent do her chores or her school work cause she dosent feel like it.
Ashton wouldnt have to hear my constant bitching all the time.
Im a horrible friend to Zoe. Shes probably better of (or at least a-okay) without me in the picture.
I dont think it would really effect anyone else. Those are the only people i really interact with that i think i burden on a regular basis.
I think im getting better. Im going to therapy ig. But thats just burdening dad cause he has to do all these medical expense shit. Even the lady i was talking to thinks im a bad person because i admitted to being a shitty bully in order to make myself look better.
Im a bad person and i deserve to be dead.
Maybe i cant get better.
Im still fucking useless. Im still pathetic.
I fucking hate myself.
My dad made me ice cream. I haven't eaten it. I dont want it. I dont want to force myself to eat it. Gaining weight. 110 lbs. To heavy for me. Dont deserve to look healthy.
I dont do my fucking chores.
I dont do my homework.
Maybe they will get a refund on this semester of college if i die. Itll be like dropping out.
I wish death was just emptiness.
I wish i would stop breathing.
I deserve hell anyway.
Kristen takes on 5 classes, a job, and responsibilities at home. You cant handle 2 classes 3 days a week, a job where you only work 4 hours a day, and cleaning a couple counters?? thats fucking sad. You deserve to die you pathetic waste of air.
Ashton takes on a job and more classes too. Youre absolutely pathetic to be this useless and depressed over this fuck you.
I should really just kill myself and make it easier on everyone.
Kristen wouldnt have someone nagging her to do things w me and being needy all the time.
Dad wouldnt have to deal with me being a lazy piece of shit that dosent do her chores or her school work cause she dosent feel like it.
Ashton wouldnt have to hear my constant bitching all the time.
Im a horrible friend to Zoe. Shes probably better of (or at least a-okay) without me in the picture.
I dont think it would really effect anyone else. Those are the only people i really interact with that i think i burden on a regular basis.
I think im getting better. Im going to therapy ig. But thats just burdening dad cause he has to do all these medical expense shit. Even the lady i was talking to thinks im a bad person because i admitted to being a shitty bully in order to make myself look better.
Im a bad person and i deserve to be dead.
Maybe i cant get better.
Im still fucking useless. Im still pathetic.
I fucking hate myself.
My dad made me ice cream. I haven't eaten it. I dont want it. I dont want to force myself to eat it. Gaining weight. 110 lbs. To heavy for me. Dont deserve to look healthy.
I dont do my fucking chores.
I dont do my homework.
Maybe they will get a refund on this semester of college if i die. Itll be like dropping out.
I wish death was just emptiness.
I wish i would stop breathing.
I deserve hell anyway.
Kristen takes on 5 classes, a job, and responsibilities at home. You cant handle 2 classes 3 days a week, a job where you only work 4 hours a day, and cleaning a couple counters?? thats fucking sad. You deserve to die you pathetic waste of air.
Ashton takes on a job and more classes too. Youre absolutely pathetic to be this useless and depressed over this fuck you.
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